Pagosa Springs Artists

Self Loathing

 

is a vicious thing
  that begins simply
  as a desire for joy.
  Longing for more
  leads to giving in
  to self,

  to the impulse
  of the moment,
   to self-gratification,
   which is not
   the same as
   appreciation of self.

   The more
   I  tapped the store
   of sure gratification,
   the more I lost
   all self control,
   satisfaction.

   Lost the ability to plan,
   to work for goals,
   to be a man.
   And that’s the way
   my self loathing
   began.

 

 

 

first published in BEHIND PRISON WALLS Chapbook

©2011 Bonnie Manion

   

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